Suspension

**Bilal** · 02-01-2007, 12:46

Hello everyone!Did you ever suspend someone from training and why and how long?
(I found a thread about refusing potential students, but that's not the issue I mean.)

Bilal

**moogong** · 02-01-2007, 13:01

Yes, once. This young man was living in an adult group home due to having some issues with the law. About six months after he started training he was arrested for assult on a female resident of the home. To make matters worse she was mentally challenged and they had been "dating".
The following week she was brought into class by a slightly better off resident so I (and the other two instructors) could see her battered face. She also wanted to know how she could defend herself from him.
When he was released from jail he had gotten word that it had made it back to the dojang so he came by to explain himself. After seeing the victim and hearing his babel, it was made clear to him to never come back.
Eventually the young girl's parents moved her to another home and he is not serving time in prison.

He is still not welcome in the dojang after his release.

**Mark Barlow** · 02-01-2007, 13:07

I've kicked a couple of folks out for domestic violence and suspended one black belt for a month for using excessive force in his job as a bouncer.

Over the past 27 years, I've probably shown a dozen people the door for various reasons but only suspended the one black belt.

**CEB** · 02-01-2007, 13:27

Yes.

How long? Permanent.

If it is serious enough for a suspension then you don't want them in the dojo.

**Eliz** · 02-01-2007, 14:58

I have seen it happen twice.

Alcohol both times wherein the respective students were clearly showing up to classes under the influence. I don't think either ban was permanent. I believe they were just excused until such a time as they could get cleaned up (dried out).

**drivica** · 02-01-2007, 15:02

I did it and Ido it often, whenever I find out (directly or from partents) that some kid has bad grades in school. After they get satisfactory grades, they can rejoin the classes, with agreement of parents. Another reason for suspension in my dojo is when someone does not attend classes without giving me a phone call for explanations. In such case I give them one month off to pull themselves together and I set the exact date they have to check in. If they don't do that, they are expelled permanently. Third reason is excessive force and/or fight during classes, or verbal insults - in which case student must take a week off, think about everything and then come back to appologize in front of all.

**CEB** · 02-01-2007, 15:04

Originally Posted by Eliz Seuferling

I have seen it happen twice.

Alcohol both times wherein the respective students were clearly showing up to classes under the influence. I don't think either ban was permanent. I believe they were just excused until such a time as they could get cleaned up (dried out).

I never thought that. I never had anyone come to class drunk. That is just stupid.

My sensei would have probably just ran them ragged then probably worked them over for being stupid. I guess, if he was really annoyed he could have arrested them for public intoxication.

**Cliff Hargrave** · 02-01-2007, 15:09

I have told three to go away and never come back. One tried to rape a girl, one was just completely disruptive in class and was dangerous to train with, and one was carrying on an affair with a married classmate and causing drama in my dojo.

**Eliz** · 02-01-2007, 15:27

Originally Posted by CEB

I never thought that. I never had anyone come to class drunk. That is just stupid.

My sensei would have probably just ran them ragged then probably worked them over for being stupid. I guess, if he was really annoyed he could have arrested them for public intoxication.

Yea. I know both had problems. One was legitimate alcholism. The other had been through a serious trauma - a window washer had fallen 37 stories and literally splatted in front of him as he was exiting a building. REALLY messed him up.

I don't think either instructor wanted to get too far into those issues and just excused them.

**wingchundo.girl** · 02-02-2007, 08:30

I had to kick out a whole family. Imagine my luck to have nine people from one family want to join. But I quickly came to realize that they were all nuts! The family dynamic was seven adults and two kids.

The inter family drama was one issue, they fought among themselves and complained constantly about each other. Tearing out of the parking lot, burning rubber and potentially putting other people in danger.

The drama they loved to create for me and my instructors in the school was another, one of them accused an instructor, who I have known for seven years and is the most polite, nurturing woman I know, of being excessively rude and calling her stupid and fat. She later accused another instructor, again someone I know would never treat any of our students this way, of being rude and glaring at her.

The children were spoiled and acted up but were actually the best of the bunch. One day the grandmother came flying into my office, in a rage, demanding that I do something about the children's instructor, that he had no right to tell the kids to get off the mat. Later on she called my office to tell me "oh by the way, the instructor had grabbed the child and dragged him off the mat." This of course was not the case, and she made no mention of it initially.

This was the last straw for me. I told the woman I have never had so much trouble with one student, let alone with a whole family in the 15 years I have been in business. I felt that since her problems with my staff and with each other seemed unsurmountable that it would be better for all concerned to sever our business relationship.

I established a new rule at our school - No one can be crazier than me.

**Bilal** · 02-06-2007, 07:31

Thank you for your answers so far.

**Tang-Soo-Architect** · 02-06-2007, 07:55

My Master once suspended an adult Gup grade because he didn't turn up for the regional championships. He had no legitiamte excuse for not being there. What made it worse was that people had been trying to contact him, including other students who had helped him prepare, the week before the championships and he had failed to get back to anyone.
He had pulled a similar stunt the year before where he had failed to turn up at another championship with no excuse or reason.

As you can imagine my Master was not happy that not only himself but his other students had been let down and thier time wasted. When the guy turned up for training he was taken to one side, given a good talking to and then sent home with a six week suspension.

**Brian Dugger** · 02-06-2007, 08:46

Suspension and Expulsion are not fun. I've suspended one and expelled the another. Not fun, especially the conditions that resulted in having to do this. The students really wanted to continue, but under the circumstances it couldn't be permitted for the sake of the dojo as a whole.

**Chris Wade** · 02-07-2007, 15:08

Originally Posted by Mark Barlow

I've kicked a couple of folks out for domestic violence and suspended one black belt for a month for using excessive force in his job as a bouncer.

Over the past 27 years, I've probably shown a dozen people the door for various reasons but only suspended the one black belt.

I found this one interesting.

What was your rationale for kicking him out due to incidents that happened in his job?

**Brian Dugger** · 02-08-2007, 10:42

Originally Posted by Chris Wade

. . .What was your rationale for kicking him out due to incidents that happened in his job?

Originally Posted by Mark Barlow

. . . suspended one black belt for a month for using excessive force in his job as a bouncer.

Everyone has their perception of what excessive is, right? It's like the difference between pink and purple.

**Tonersensei** · 07-01-2009, 14:14

Never suspended an adult, only a teen for being mouthy (not with me, with his parents in the dojo parking lot). I did unfortunately have to expel and adult male student for inappropriately touching a female student during training. He was a longtime, faithful student, but I have a zero tolerance policy for that crap.

**DragonMind** · 07-02-2009, 09:05

Since this thread is 2 1/2 years old, I wouldn't expect too much of a reply...

**JWhiteSensei** · 09-19-2009, 22:31

I have never suspended anyone from classes. I check my younger students grades in school and if they are not performng at a "C" average at least, I will not let them test until they bring their grades up.

I don't dictate my student's personal lives. Certainly if I discover thay are into illegal activities I will do the right thing.

It is a standing rule ay my dojo that you leave the drama outside the door when you come in. You are there to train.

All in all it is my philosophy that we, as instructors and no matter which art, are there to better our student's lives. We are in many cases the only positive role model some of them have in their lives. To take that away a positive influence from them will not help the situation. Sometimes if you have a student that is on the wrong path, they have actually come to you, even subconscioulsy (forgive spelling) , for help. In those cases we should help show them a better way.

Not all students and not all situations are the same. If there is something major going on or illegal it certainly warrants action on our parts.

**Mark Barlow** · 09-20-2009, 11:55

Originally Posted by Chris Wade

I found this one interesting.

What was your rationale for kicking him out due to incidents that happened in his job?

Sorry, I know I'm a couple of years late but I didn't see the question till now.

The student was an outstanding martial artist. He had been with me over 10 years and combining his ability with the fact that he was 6'5", 250lbs, he did not need to hurt anyone to accomplish his job. I've worked as a bouncer before and know that, as a rule, it doesn't take much to beat a drunk. Over the course of a couple of months, he put 3 people in the hospital. I considered this excessive. Since it was well know that he was a student and assistant instructor under me, I did now want the dojo to be represented that way.

I spoke to him before I suspended him, explaining how I felt and the actions I would take if he continued to needlessly hurt people. When it happened again, I did what I told him I'd do. After the suspension period was over, he returned to class, apologized and, to my knowledge, never repeated his behavior.